Artist Lost: A Love Story
This Is A Love Story
A story for when you have gotten a little lost (+ a song)
Once there was a girl who loved art, and dance and the outdoors. She loved the feeling of being wild and free. Soon she realized she would have to make her way in the world and that required that she be somebody.
So she set out to do the things that somebodies do. She set aside her artist self and she got practical training in a practical field and while she liked learning about new things, she liked the work less and less. She did this again in another practical field and at once she was successful, but because she wasn’t well suited for the work it took a lot of extra trying, so much trying, and eventually the more she tried the more she failed.
I once had a coach ask me what I did for fun. At the time, I remember being stunned because I had no answer. Blank. I realized I had no idea what fun was anymore and I certainly wasn’t having any.
Have you ever gotten so far away from yourself that you can’t even remember what it is that sparks you?
There are clues from your childhood. Consider how you spent your time when you got bored, what you found yourself doing when you could do whatever you wanted, or what you wished you could be doing instead of sitting in school. What were the moments you looked forward to ?
You can get an idea by free-writing some of your favorite memories.
Get a journal or some paper
Set a timer for 5 minutes
Take a deep breath and respond to these prompts:
When I was young, what I enjoyed about the weekend was…
Doing this made the time fly by…
My favorite memories are…
These are the breadcrumbs that will inform you of what you can give some attention to, and see what happens. When I did this exploration, I spent hours and hours spent drawing and painting, romping around in nature; trees in particular, Saturday mornings dancing to soul train, listening to albums and painting my bedroom walls. Live music, sprinkled with a love of learning and copious amounts of reading and philosophical contemplation.
It turns out, I have been longing to paint and dance for 30 years. I don’t know why it has taken me so long to return, or even why I ever left. I just stopped painting. I just stopped dancing. But here I am now, engaging in this delicious creative process of life. I do still have a day job (I’m the CFO of our company) but I have learned to let go of all non-essential tasks in order to allow room for what makes me come alive.
If you find yourself on your own journey for more aliveness, you can join me here. I’ll send you a catalog of selected works, invitations to exhibitions and special events, and first look at new work.
The making of this piece, Universal Motion, helped me to remember.
It is the first piece that is infused with the quality of movement that is full of life and aliveness. Its many layers reflect a journey of fearless longing and the magic that happens when you realize your soul has come back home.
If it speaks to you, or you find yourself wanting to bring a sense of remembering into your life, it is available.